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PrintIt's summer
While you slept, summer began. Oh, a few of you Druids and insomniacs were awake at 2:46 a.m. to mark the moment, but nothing can compare to the blow-out at Stonehenge, the ancient stone circle in England, where 20,000 people, some of them white-robed Druids, were expected. (Little know fact: One rock at Stonehenge is shaped like an ancient summer gas grill, with three grilling areas and all-wheel drive.) Solstice comes from the Latin words sol, meaning sun, and sistere, meaning to cause to stand still. Putting it together, we have the sun seemingly standing still at it highest point in the sky. It's the longest day -- for us, that means about 15 hours of daylight. The range is about 12 hours at the equator to 24 in the Arctic Circle, where it can be really hard to get the kids to bed.
More stillness
From a column by Jeff Danziger, a nationally syndicated political cartoonist, in the Rutland Herald and Times Argus in Vermont: "The best advice you'll ever get is to stay home in the summer. Do what you have to do to make the place comfortable, and then don't move. Master hammock technology, iced tea chemistry, the art of thinking about nothing, and if work is absolutely necessary, you can always swat at some bugs ... This is mostly true because the summer is so short. But like the watched clock that moves slower, you can make it seem longer by remaining very still. You can make hay while the sun shines, but you can also let other people, with newer equipment, and balers that actually tie knots in hay bales, do it for you. It's best to sit and watch the sun rise and set and have a sozzle or two."
Distillness
One of the most popular summer sozzles is the gin and tonic with a slice of lime, the official Summer Drink of The Morning File, although we don't do brand endorsements. Gin has so many British connections, you'd think they invented it. But we must thank the Dutch, who really didn't know what they were doing -- or did they?-- because they first used it "for medicinal purposes." To make it palatable, the base alcohol was infused with aromatic juniper berries. While the martini is enjoying a boom with all manner of horrific and unconscionable variants, like the asparagus and chocolate martini, the gin and tonic remains pure. It, too, has impeccable medical credentials. Britons living in Asia had to cope with malaria, and it was discovered that quinine, an ingredient in tonic water, offered relief. Gin was added to make the medicine go down. Hey, anything to further public health.
That's p-u-k-h
Quote
"Summer afternoon--summer afternoon; to me those have always been the two most beautiful words in the English language." -- Henry James
Highlights of sun history
4.5 billion B.C. The sun is born, with the late George Burns on hand for the ribbon-cutting. Scientists say it's got a good 10-30 billion-years life expectancy.
2000-1500 B.C. Stonehenge is built. No cost overruns reported, but the builders have trouble making the 500-year deadline.
1500 B.C. The sundial is invented, but the company goes out of business within days because of a barrage of lawsuits over damaged wrists.
1499 B.C. First American tourist shows up at the Stonehenge Hardrock Cafe and complains about the lack of ice for his gin and tonic.
Pre-1870 A.D. Pittsburgh enjoys year-round sun and is second only to Cancun in tourism before the steel industry emerges and sets up an impenetrable smokescreen that remains well into the next century. An infuriated Californian named God banishes the sun from these parts for at least two-thirds of the year, including most weekends and Pirates home games.
1970s A.D. After billions of years of excellent press, the sun begins to develop an image problem. Once thought to be an unqualified good, it's fingered more and more in skin cancer and unfairly suffers collateral damage for global warming, so for the first time in its 4.5 billion-year history, it hires a public relations firm.
